Purple sky

If only I could believe, like a child
That a star was born, the day you died
I would find you on the sky
And though I could never reach you
I would know that you know that I can see you
And this knowing would be speech between us

But I know too much, and too little
To believe, like I once did
I cannot make sense of the words, or the stories.
Perhaps one day the curtains will fall
And the little someone directing it all
Will suddenly appear from behind the screen

He will be small, like a caged little mouse
All the more reason, to feel awkward
Is it my heart to see him like this?
But then I will ask him, straight up
I know you get this, tons
But why could I not believe?

Why did I not hear that quiet, still voice?
Was I too busy, was I engrossed?
Why did I fear every sunset that came
Why is it only, the pain that remained?
Why didn't I thank, every blessing you gave?
But mostly: where were you hiding that day?